Christina “Tina” Cacho Sakai, LMFT
President, LA-CAMFT

With Gratitude

As we come to the close of this year, I am honored to express my profound gratitude for the remarkable year we have had at LA-CAMFT. This year has been nothing short of phenomenal, and I believe it is a direct result of the participation of our chapter members, volunteers, and leaders. Without you all, we would not have LA-CAMFT. I would also like to take a moment to acknowledge each member of the board for their invaluable contributions and tireless efforts. Your collective wisdom has played a pivotal role in the success of LA-CAMFT. As we look to the future, I am filled with optimism and excitement for what lies ahead. I have no doubt that LA-CAMFT will continue to thrive and reach even greater heights in the years to come.

With gratitude, I’d like to highlight two prominent leaders that I have had the privilege to get to know and work alongside—LA-CAMFT President-Elect, Jennifer Stonefield, LMFT and Past-President, Leanne Nettles, LMFT! Both of them speak to the specialness of LA-CAMFT being a place to connect, belong and feel supported.

Jennifer Stonefield, LMFT describes “flying under the radar” when she began attending meetings at the Olympic Collection prior to the pandemic to network and obtain continuing education credits. Little did she know that she would become President-Elect in 2023. Jenn describes her LA-CAMFT leadership journey starting when the 2020 President made an announcement at one of the CE events that the board of directors were looking for a Secretary.

Having had administrative experience, Jenn reached out, sent in her resume, came to a board meeting and was appointed Board Secretary in June 2020. Jenn’s commitment to LA-CAMFT leadership was widely noticed and was invited to continue to serve on the Board of Directors for the 3-year-presidential term of President-Elect 2023, President 2024 and Past-President 2025.

Jennifer’s “why” to being a LA-CAMFT Leader:

• I realized LA-CAMFT leadership is a family and that was really important to me especially during the pandemic.
• When one of the board members hits a dark time, we all step up to make sure they know they are supported.
• Jennifer’s “highlights” to being a LA-CAMFT Leader:
• The first time meeting people in-person at the LA-CAMFT Appreciation Dinner 2022.
• Attending the LA-CAMFT Holiday Party 2022 at Clearview Treatment Center.
• Leading the 2023 in-person Leadership Retreat in the home of a past-president.

Jennifer’s “hopes and dreams” for LA-CAMFT:

• In-person board meetings that are sprinkled throughout the year at various locations and on alternate days in order to make them more accessible to all, especially those in community mental health.
• Encompass the idea that we are family, find people who see the connection we have with each other and want to be part of it.
• Create and sustain leaders that want to move LA-CAMFT forward. People who see all the positives despite the negatives and continue to grow and move mountains.

Leanne Nettles, LMFT connected with LA-CAMFT through the Therapist of Color Support Group in 2018 and shared the experience of feeling “so affirmed in a way that I never knew I needed. I felt like I was taken seriously regarding a race-based concern that I was having at work. I felt validated, welcomed, and held.” In 2019 Leanne was invited to join the Diversity Committee and in 2020 attended her first Leadership Retreat where she saw the vision and witnessed LA-CAMFT as a forerunner in finding ways to connect and build community. Leanne’s leadership skills were widely noticed as she organized the first Anti-Racism Roundtable in August 2020 and in response from community feedback helped create an action plan to address areas of historic inequity in the profession, including: 1) Education and Training 2) Support Groups 3) Mentorship 4) Outreach and Accessibility 5) Policy Change. From there, Leanne was invited to serve on the LA-CAMFT Board of Directors for the 3-year-presidential term of President-Elect 2021, President 2022, and Past-President 2023.

Leanne’s “why” to being a LA-CAMFT Leader:

• I truly do believe that therapists change the world one client at a time and I recognize that there are a lot of areas where therapists need support in order to have longevity in the field.
• LA-CAMFT not only has a vision but takes action toward social justice and I want to be on a team that not only has high hopes but acts upon them.
• I want to be part of making positive change and providing supports for therapists across LA County.

Leanne’s “highlights” to being a LA-CAMFT Leader:

• Participating in the Therapists of Color Mentorship Program Committee, being on the forefront of something so revolutionary and seeing it come to fruition with how many mentees and mentors we have matched.
• Being able to work with diverse backgrounds together on a common cause and not just having high hopes and pie in the sky fantasies of what the world could be like but putting our money where our mouth is and investing in the community by creating and facilitating different programs.
• Facilitating the Anti-Racism Roundtable Series where we listen to the needs of our community, take the feedback, and actually do something about it.
• Seeing the true DEI work being done through accountability, incredible action toward introspection and taking action toward the service of therapists of color.

Leanne’s “hopes and dreams” for LA-CAMFT:

• We will expand our reach to therapists in community mental health and create accessibility for therapists in workplaces other than private practice.
• Bolster our 3000 Club and do more outreach to local grad schools letting people know they have support even before they graduate.
• More therapists of color to become involved in the workings of LA-CAMFT.
• If you are looking for a place where you could belong and connect with other people and feel cared for, LA-CAMFT is it!

Much gratitude to Jennifer and Leanne for sharing their experience, strength, and hope for LA-CAMFT with the broader LA-CAMFT Community! If you would like to get in contact with either of them you could find them here: https://lacamft.org/Board-of-Directors-2023.

Thank you to each and every one of you for allowing me to be LA-CAMFT President 2023! 

Christina “Tina” Cacho Sakai, LMFT

Christina "Tina" Cacho Sakai, LMFT (she/her) is a Latinx (Mexican-American) psychotherapist in private practice and a former community based therapist, clinical supervisor, associate director, and adjunct faculty at CSULA. She provides psychotherapy in a culturally responsive, LGBTQIA+ affirming and social justice-oriented atmosphere. Treatment specializations include healing from trauma, processing grief and loss, exploring creativity, and honoring full intersectional identities. She is currently in the BIPOC Somatic Experiencing Training Certificate Program.

LA-CAMFT 2023 Annual Holiday Party

Sunday, December 3, 2023
1:00 pm-4:00 pm

It’s time to celebrate with friends and colleagues at LA-CAMFT’s Annual Holiday Party. All are invited to come gather together in celebrating another terrific year for our community. Please join us for a delicious food, laughter, and musical merriment with your LA-CAMFT friends and colleagues.

We have created a special “Welcome to Our Newly Licensed MFTs” ritual. If you received your license in 2022 or 2023 and you would like to be a part of this ceremony, please let me know by emailing me (specialeventschair@lacamft.org) and registering for our Holiday Party. We will also be celebrating the passing of the baton to our newly elected LA-CAMFT Board of Directors.

When:
Sunday, December 3, 2023
1:00 p.m. – 4:00 p.m.

Where:
Clearview Treatment Programs
911 Coeur D'Alene Avenue, Venice, CA 90291

Cost:
$10 Registration Fee that Goes Toward Food
and Covid Safety Considerations

Register Here

Getting Paid: Private Practice Success Minus Stress — This Year’s Top 10 Articles to Make Your Practice Even Better This Season

‘Tis the season to be giving, so, my gift to you, once again, is 10 of the best articles I’ve come across this year — the ones that give the best answers to the questions that therapists have about how make and keep their practices profitable and successful — without having to spend a lot of time or money or effort to do so.

Each of these articles is a short and easy read — and every single one of them is chock full of the best tips and information that therapists can quickly and easily use to make their practice better any time of the year. Reading any one of them will definitely give you more private practice success — minus stress!

So, if you have a little time during this season to reflect on your practice and how to make it better, stronger, more profitable, and more, take a look at one of these and see what you think.

1. Set Your Hourly Rate in Psychotherapy Private Practice
2. How to Market Your Private Practice Without Feeling Gross  
3. The Personal Branding Guide for Therapists
4. 10 Reasons Pinterest Is My Social Media Tool Of Choice
5. Time Off is Essential: Are You Getting Enough?
6. Networking as a Therapist: If, Why, and How
7. Money, Honey: How to Get a Good Biller for Your Private Pay Therapy Practice
8. My Top Ten Recommendations for Starting a Private Practice
9. Tips for Figuring Out Your Schedule as a Therapist in Private Practice
10. When to Splurge in Your Practice

There you have it, your very own Private Practice Coaching Kit. Enjoy your reading! 

If you want to look at the previous year’s Top 10 List, click on this link.

Happy Holidays!

Lynne Azpeitia, LMFT, AAMFT Approved Supervisor, is in private practice in Santa Monica where she works with Couples and Gifted, Talented, and Creative Adults across the lifespan. Lynne’s been doing business and clinical coaching with mental health professionals for more than 15 years, helping professionals develop even more successful careers and practices. To learn more about her in-person and online services, workshops or monthly no-cost Online Networking & Practice Development Lunch visit www.Gifted-Adults.com or www.LAPracticeDevelopment.com.

Getting Better and Losing Relationships

“Want to go to a bar tonight, drink and pick up guys?” She hasn’t gotten that invitation in a long time. Matter of fact, she hasn’t gotten a call or seen that person for a long time.

When a person is seriously ill with her eating disorder, many people are attracted to her and maintain a relationship with her as she lives and responds in life with her eating disorder intact. They are attracted to the needy, people pleasing, high risk-taking person who rarely says no.

Being in in recovery and in harmony with her true self attracts more healthy relationships.

Changes in recovery
Some people are in your life because they admire your strivings toward being your best self and your eagerness to learn. Others, who suffer from their own disorders, appreciate being with someone who shares their symptoms.

When you are deep in your eating disorder your friends and associates have a relationship with a sick person.

When you start to get well your attitudes, choices and responses change.

1. You are more caring and respectful of yourself.
2. You resist sacrificing your personal resources (time, money, skills, energy) because you no longer believe that others are more important than you.
3. You begin to use your resources to make your own dreams come true, dreams you didn’t know you had because they were buried by the eating disorder.
4. You no longer engage is high risk behavior for thrills or because you are going along with everyone else and are numb to your fears.
5. You feel.
6. You regain your mind.
7. You have opinions.
8. You have a point of view.
9. You matter to yourself.
10. You say an authentic "No," where you used to give an unwilling "Yes."

Quality Friendships
You have people in your life who appreciate your growing, healing, searching for answers, living the adventure that brings you more healthy development and advancements in your life. These are the people who saw through your symptoms and grew to love the woman you really are.

They cheer your recovery. They are happy to spend quality time with you. They enjoy the gift of you that you share with them.

Objections to Recovery
The people in your life who were attracted to you with you eating disorder symptoms and, for reasons of their own, are psychologically matched to you based on those symptoms, may object to the change toward health in your life.

They can be ruffled, disappointed and then hurt and angry.

If they can grow themselves and accept your healthy attitudes then the relationships change and grow.

If they cannot grow and adapt, if they need a relationship with a person who goes numb, who says yes, who sacrifices and feels guilty and responsible for other people's needs, who takes dangerous and unnecessary risks, then they will grow both resentful and bored.

If you do not go back to how you were when you were ill so the relationship is the same as it ever was, the relationship will fall apart. If you are truly in recovery, you will not or cannot go back to your illness to support people who require a self-sacrificing person to fulfill their needs. And you will love the people who enjoy your recovery and share in healthy development more than ever.

Getting Better 
As you live your life with more health, as you drop the eating disorder life symptoms, people who are attracted to health will be attracted to you.

New people who have their own solid self-esteem and are willing to be responsible for themselves will become visible to you as you become visible to them. Invitations are more personal based on what you and the other person care about.

In recovery and growing health, you have more choices and can have more satisfying relationships based on who you are now.

How have your relationships changed as you progress on your recovery path?

Joanna Poppink, LMFT, psychotherapist, speaker, and author of Healing Your Hungry Heart: Recovering from Your Eating Disorder, is in private practice and specializes in Eating Disorder Recovery for adult women and with an emphasis on building a fulfilling life beyond recovery. She is licensed in California, Florida, Oregon, and Utah. All appointments are virtual. Website: EatingDisorderRecovery.net

LA-CAMFT Diversity Committee
Presents:

Black Therapist Support Group

First Saturday of this Month

Next Meeting:
Saturday, December 2, 2023
12:00 pm-1:30 pm (PT)

Online Via Zoom

Black Therapist Support Group

A safe place for healing, connection, support and building community. In this group, licensed clinicians, associates and students can come together and process experiences of racism (systemic, social, and internalized), discrimination, implicit bias, and micro-aggressions, along with additional experiences that therapists of African descent encounter in the field of mental health. As the late great Maya Angelou once said, “As soon as healing takes place, go out and heal someone else.” May this space be the support needed to facilitate that journey.

Open to LA-CAMFT Members and Non-Members

First Saturday of Each Month

Location: Zoom Meeting

For more information contact Akiah Robinson Selwa, LMFT at aselwa@sunrisetherapycenter.org.

Event Details: 

For:
Licensed Therapists, Associates, and Students

Event Details: 
Saturday, December 2, 2023
12:00 pm-1:30 pm (PT)Time of Check-In: 11:50 am

Where: 
Online Via Zoom

Once you have registered for the presentation, we will email you a link to Zoom a few days before the presentation.

Cost:

No Charge

Online Registration CLOSES on the date of the event.

(Registration is open and available until the group ends.)

Questions about Registration? Contact  Diversity Committee, diversitycommittee@lacamft.org.

Register Here

If You Build It, They Will Come:
The Transformational Space of Men’s Groups

Men’s therapy groups provide an exceptional opportunity for men to be fully themselves with one another. In addition to traditional roles men often play, they also have deeper longings for more meaningful, authentic contact in their lives, and group therapy is one venue where they get to practice the here-and-now experience of greater connection and vulnerability. In his 1988 book Bradshaw: On The Family (which was later expanded into a PBS series), John Bradshaw made the distinction between human doings and human beings, and men’s groups offer a space for men to experience themselves more dimensionally and less imprisoned in the doing role.

My first exposure to men’s groups was in the early ‘80s when my dad attended his weekly group in Center City Philadelphia. I was in high school at the time and didn’t have much exposure to therapy yet. Because we lived in the suburban bubble of South Jersey, it seemed quite revolutionary and mysterious that he would travel into our urban center every Tuesday night to meet with a diverse group of men. All I knew is that he was devoted to his weekly ritual, and he seemed to return home with a more optimistic and refreshed outlook. After five years of attending his men’s group, my father built up the courage to separate from my mother and start a new chapter for himself. Discovering his true voice through the group experience allowed him to make a bold decision after thirty years of marriage and was a formative event in my family history.

In the late ‘80s I enrolled in the MSW program at UCLA, and in 1992 I became an associate in a busy private practice in West L.A. where I was asked to lead a men’s psychotherapy group which felt to me like being thrown into the deep end of the pool. Although I felt as if I was treading water at times, I slowly built-up clinical muscle and returned every Wednesday night for eight more years thanks to the superb supervision I received.

Through the course of my career, I’ve led many men’s groups, and this article is intended to simply share one clinical perspective. It may be relevant to mention that my current group therapy lens is based on the interpersonal, here-and-now, process groups existing in my practice today.

Men’s Groups vs. Mixed Gender Groups

Why would a client choose a men’s group over a mixed gender group? This is always a complex question that is not simple to address. After brainstorming some of the primary clinical themes, I realized that it’s not necessarily the specific content, but more importantly, the honest conversations that are forged between and among males.  For example, in a recent group session there were two men who chose to reveal their sexual abuse history.  It’s possible that this issue can be discussed in a mixed gender group, but the willingness to share a highly vulnerable issue among other men signified a deep trust and safety which in turn promoted deeper contact and intimacy among group members. Because men are generally socialized not to be vulnerable, men’s groups turn this paradigm upside down, not only encouraging vulnerability but typically establishing emotional risk-taking as a group norm.

Another ongoing theme in my men’s groups relates to father hunger.  Because most men in my groups were born between 1965 and 1995, their fathers grew up in a generation where a feelings language was virtually non-existent.  Because this theme surfaces time and time again, it reveals the emotional distance many of my clients experienced and sometimes continue to experience with their fathers. This may be part and parcel of the subgroup of men who seek therapy, but regardless of the reason, these men are hungry for emotionally reliable men as well as mentors.  As men grow to be more transparent with one another, male bonding becomes easier and more cohesive. Not only is this form of bonding a healing element for men, but they often feel parented by one another through deeply honest conversations infused with respect and trust.

These are some of the primary clinical themes often explored in a men’s therapy group that provide a highly unusual growth opportunity in the presence of other men:

• Competition and control
• Addictions and trauma
• Career and money
• Father hunger and male bonding
• Shame and isolation
• Sex and sexuality

When I meet a male-identified client for the first time, I’m already considering his eventual appropriateness for group. Once a client has fully identified and explored his therapeutic issues in individual therapy, it may be time to consider transitioning into a group process. There is no cookie-cutter approach to the timing of a client considering or joining a group, but I always hold this possibility if my clinical instinct tells me that they would be a strong candidate. Because most of my individual clients generally know that I lead groups in my practice, they may express interest, or I may plant a seed in that direction typically within the first year of individual therapy. Although I may be eager to transition a client into my group, I always need to check in with myself to make sure that the client wants group more than I want it for him.

There are also several questions that may reveal whether a client is ready to participate effectively in a men’s group:

• Is the client able to offer empathy and attunement?
• Is the client able to receive empathy and attunement?
• Does the client appear enthusiastic about a men’s group experience?
• Is the client interested in developing more honest, satisfying relationships with other men?
• Does the client have a foundation of individual therapy?
• Does the client have past experiences with 12-step groups, self-help groups or support groups?
• Is the client willing to comply with group guidelines?

To develop longer-term cohesion in men’s psychotherapy groups, the following themes promote greater trust and safety:

• Cultivating honest, satisfying relationships with the members of the group and the group therapist
• Developing deeper, meaningful contact rather than simply getting along with others
• Expanding one’s capacity for giving and receiving clear and honest feedback
• Understanding one’s impact on others
• Accessing and articulating one’s internal world
• Exploring deeper longings (e.g., father hunger)
• Assessing one’s fulfillment with sex and sexuality
• Expressing anger safely and productively
• Acknowledging and processing shame
• Examining loneliness and longings for connection

Bringing together a sustainable men’s psychotherapy group often requires a tremendous commitment from the group therapist, but it can also be one of the most fulfilling and sacred experiences available to a clinician. As a witness to men learning how to be fully themselves with one another, it’s an extraordinary unfolding that far transcends the challenges group formation requires. Having led men’s groups since 1992, I’ve felt and continue to feel the utmost gratitude and respect for my groups as I continue to learn and grow beside my clients.  As my dad shared so poignantly many years ago, “my men’s group helped me reclaim my voice and my life.”

Andrew Susskind is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Brainspotting and Somatic Experiencing Practitioner, Certified Group Psychotherapist and author based on the Westside of Los Angeles since 1992 specializing in trauma and addictive, compulsive behaviors. His book, It’s Not About the Sex: Moving from Isolation to Intimacy after Sexual Addiction (Central Recovery Press, June 2019) joins his workbook, From Now On: Seven Keys to Purposeful Recovery which was released in 2014.

present

Evolution of Psychotherapy

December 12-17, 2023

We're thrilled to announce a partnership between Evolution of Psychotherapy and the Los Angeles Chapter of CAMFT! This partnership will enable learners throughout our networks and communities to learn from the masters of psychotherapy, provide effective and efficient care to patients, and help shape the future of the field.
 

Since 1985, the Evolution of Psychotherapy conference has been the most anticipated psychotherapy event of the year. We invite you to join us! Learn directly from the living legends in Anaheim, California, during a unique educational experience where the masters of psychotherapy, breakout thinkers, and on-the-ground professionals will reinvigorate your passion for the field of psychotherapy.

Register Here

Divorce: How to Create Emotional Safety for Your Kids

Picture this: a once joyful and united household transformed into a battlefield of unspoken pain and hidden tears, where innocent hearts are the unwitting victims. This is the reality for countless children caught in the crossfire of their parents’ divorces. It’s a disheartening scene that exposes children to emotional turmoil and feelings of insecurity, a poignant reminder of the gaps we need to bridge to safeguard their emotional wellbeing. But what if there was a path, less traversed, where the collateral damage to these young souls could be minimized? What if there was a way to transform this chaotic journey into a peaceful transition?

The Problem
Divorce unleashes a whirlwind of challenges. It dismantles the family structure, throwing parents and children into new, often stressful living dynamics. It burdens divorcees with guilt, anger, and a myriad of other emotions, affecting their ability to parent effectively. It is simply unfair, especially to the children, who are thrust into situations they neither chose nor understand, as the foundational pillars of their lives seemingly crumble. But, it doesn’t have to be a journey marred by pain and resentment; there is an alternative path paved with understanding and healing. 

5 Ways to Create Emotional Safety for Your Children
As a seasoned divorce mediator with over 30 years of experience, my mission is to extend a helping hand to families navigating the turbulent waters of separation, guiding them to calmer shores. I care deeply about the emotional well-being of each family member, especially the children, and I’m here to offer insights on creating a secure emotional environment for them during such trying times. 

1. Fostering Open Communication
   Embrace Honest Conversations: Open dialogue is indispensable for allowing children to voice their feelings, fears, and thoughts. It fosters an environment of trust and understanding, promoting emotional safety. Active listening and validation of their feelings reinforce their sense of worth and alleviate anxiety, crucial for their emotional well-being during times of familial upheaval.
   
   
2. Strengthening Parent-Child Bonds
   Nurture Connection: Spending quality time is paramount. Engaging regularly in activities your children relish fosters bonds and crafts positive memories. This not only solidifies your relationship but also establishes a stable, loving environment, aiding them in adapting to new family dynamics. It’s a cornerstone in maintaining relational equilibrium amidst the changes.
   
   
3. Advocating for Emotional Literacy
   Teach Emotional Intelligence: Empowering children to identify, understand, and manage their emotions is essential for navigating the emotional upheavals of divorce. Providing tools for emotional intelligence enables them to better cope with psychological stresses and uncertainties inherent in family separations. By exemplifying healthy emotional expression and efficient conflict resolution, we pave the way for their emotional resilience and balance. This proactive approach helps in fostering a stable environment where children can thrive despite familial changes. It’s about molding resilient and emotionally balanced individuals who can face life’s challenges head-on.
   
   
4. Encouraging Professional Guidance
   Seek Counseling and Mediation: Divorce mediation provides a harmonious approach, centering on children’s emotional needs. It serves as a conduit for friendly decision-making, reducing conflict and fostering family well-being. This method aligns family members on a common ground, promoting unity and mutual respect amidst discord. It’s a transformative approach ensuring the holistic health of the family during transitional times.
   
   
5. Maintaining Consistency and Routine
   Establish Stability: Implementing a structured routine is crucial, offering children a semblance of normalcy and security amidst the chaos of divorce. Regular schedules for meals, bedtime, and other activities instill a comforting rhythm in their disrupted lives. This consistent routine acts as a stabilizing force, smoothing their transition through the upheavals of familial change. It’s a foundational step in reinforcing their sense of security and predictability. In this structured environment, children find the resilience to face new family dynamics with ease and confidence.

Your Path to Harmonious Transition
Skepticism is natural, and the road less traveled is often met with resistance. Some may doubt the effectiveness of maintaining emotional safety and the benefits of mediation, viewing them as unnecessary or cumbersome. However, understanding that this path fosters a healthier, more harmonious transition for everyone, especially the children, is the first step to embracing it. 

Take the Leap: Picture a future where divorce doesn’t equate to broken children, but to resilient ones. By adopting these practices and embracing the harmonious approach of divorce mediation, you can shield your children from the brunt of the impact, fostering their emotional security and paving the way for their flourishing futures. 

Embrace the transformation; let the shift begin with you. Reach out for guidance, and together, let’s rebuild the emotional foundations for your children, ensuring their happiness and stability amidst life’s storms. 

Remember, it’s not about the broken pieces but about how we rebuild them. Make the decision to secure your children’s emotional safety today.

Steven Unruh is a Divorce Mediator and LMFT. He completes the entire divorce process along with all the documentation. He files in 13 different courthouse throughout Southern California. Website: stevenunruh.com.