Los Angeles Chapter  California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists


Los Angeles Chapter — CAMFT

President's Message

10/31/2021 11:30 PM | Mike Johnsen (Administrator)

Jenni J.V. Wilson, LMFT
President, LA-CAMFT

Beautiful Chaos

My message this month is simply this—sometimes being grateful is hard. 

Everyone doesn’t find this time of year magical. Not everyone has a family to gather with, or friends to share a table—especially with Covid variants still having their way with us. Not everyone can find the silver lining in the gray clouds that stir over one’s solitude, while other folx gleefully make plans to travel, gift, and get. That’s okay. Most of the time I am really good at finding the positive spin, on seeing the opportunity in the crisis, the beauty in the chaos—but not all the time. 

Connecting to a bigger picture, recognizing the temporary nature of it all, sometimes can feel like an impossible task. Sometimes things simply suck and no attitude shift can remedy that. When the days get shorter, and the temperature drops—even to a chilly 65 degrees—it is normal for our systems to rebel against us, catapulting us into seasonal malaise, reluctance, and despair. If we’re lucky we get a few days off at the end of November and December, where we are faced with what we’ve not been facing. We sit with our own pain, process it in our own therapy, consultation, and/or supervision, and then find ways to wring ourselves out to freshly absorb what our clients spill for us the next time around. 

Self-care is not just a hot trendy buzzword inspiring memes and TikTok posts, podcasts, and Psychology Today articles. Self-care is not just a marketing ploy to sell vagina-scented candles, kelp smoothies, light-therapy boxes, and craft supplies. It’s a real thing that no one but you can define. Sometimes Self-Care is getting in the shower, dressing up, and pushing oneself to be social. Sometimes Self-Care is admitting you’re having a shitty day, can’t get it up to “fake it till you make it,” and prefer to put on a pair of sweats, dig into a bag of potato chips, watch That ‘70s Show reruns, and ignore texts for a while. You decide. 

I’ve traveled on Thanksgiving, hosted Thanksgiving, and felt I was being held hostage on Thanksgiving. I’ve also spent more than a handful of Thanksgivings all alone, dodging the drama and trauma Olympics of family holiday gatherings. I’ve found that it’s just another day, one that will pass, and one that only has the power and meaning we give it. If you are having a hard time summoning gratitude this year, I see you. If you are choosing Self-Care instead of over-obligation, I feel you. If you just want the few days off to process the hard stuff, organize the mess, cry or sleep, I’m with you. 

Whatever you do, I wish you low-to-no paperwork, no client crises, no family emergencies, no irritating small-talk, no broken hearts, no commercial interruptions, and no unbearable pain. But where some of those things may be present or unavoidable, where your heart has truly broken and your pain feels never-ending, I wish you restful down-time, I wish you renewal, I wish you love, and I wish you silver-linings in the beautiful chaos. 

This month on November 7 from 9:00am-3:30pm, LA-CAMFT is offering a 6-CE Suicide Prevention, Risk Assessment and Management Workshop presented via Zoom by Dr. Mekel Harris, PhD, NCSP, PMH-C. This Suicide Prevention Training is good for BBS licensure renewal, any workplace requirements, and/or overall reinforcement. LA-CAMFT is unlikely to offer this training again, so don’t miss out on it this time around. 

Keep an eye out for the 2022 Board of Directors ballot, for membership approval. We would also appreciate if members can take a few minutes to review and ratify the new bylaws—which will hopefully be showing up in your inbox by the end of the year, as well. 

As of the time of this writing, we are still planning to hold our annual in-person Holiday Party at a place TBD, on the afternoon of Sunday, December 12, 2021. Check on https://www.lacamft.org/ for more information and to register. It is a free social networking event, we will be following CDC-recommended safety protocols, and everyone is welcome. 

If you or someone you know would like to be more involved in some way or to be a part of the leadership team in the months and years to come, reach out to me at President@LACAMFT.org. You know volunteering helps lift the spirits, don’t you? 

Paz y Amor, to the grateful and ungrateful alike

JJVW — Jenni June Villegas Wilson

Jenni J.V. Wilson, LMFT is a collaborative conversationalist, trained in narrative therapy and EMDR. She works with creative and anxious clients on improving, avoiding, and eliminating co-dependent and toxic relationships, while finding healthy ways to be unapologetically themselves. She is the primary therapist at Conclusions Treatment Center IOP in Mission Hills, and has a private practice in Sherman Oaks.

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